How Time Flies

A year ago this week we got a sneak peek at Lainey. I will never forget seeing her little face, hands and feet on that monitor.

Grandma and Grandpa Reid

Lainey had so much fun playing with her Grandma and Grandpa. She was really interested in Grandpa's moustache and glasses! After she took her nap she was looking for them when we came downstairs!

Christmas Angel

I'll never tire of seeing this sweet face.

Merry Christmas

We hope your life is full of love, laughter, good food, family and friends this holiday season. 2007 was a very wonderful year for us as our angel Lainey joined our family. She is the love of our lives and we are so lucky to be her parents. As her shirt says, she is truly, "the best present ever."

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Robert, Nicole and Lainey

Santa Picture

Lainey met Santa last weekend and not a tear was shed.....by Lainey anyway! Mom was a blubbering idiot. The picture quality isn't great--I took a picture of a picture. Just too excited to share I guess.

Vikes on MNF!!!

Guess who we're rooting for tonight?

GO VIKES!!! go vikes!!!! GO VIKES!!! go vikes!!!!! GO VIKES!!!!

Look closely

You can see teeth!!!

Just Adopt!!??

This is a long but worth it article that I found recently and wanted to share. I can't tell you how many times I've had conversations with people and wanted to explain to them why you can't "just adopt."


"Just Adopt" --by Sarah Kelly

I recently had lunch with a friend who’s about to embark on her first in vitro fertilization. She needed to vent; I was happy to share. Like two soldiers, we traded war stories, not knowing whether to laugh or cry. We compared notes on the clueless things people say when they are frustrated because you haven’t had a baby yet.

Like that time, a few years ago, when I was having a grand time at a party, trying to forget—or drown—my worries. An old friend approached me, wanting to know why I didn’t have kids yet. She informed me that I had better start trying soon, so that I wouldn’t end up having to inject myself with rounds of fertility drugs. How horrible it would be if my life came to that! (It had already come to that, but thanks for the warning.)

Or the time, after I’d miscarried one of the twins from a seemingly successful IVF cycle, when another friend said, “At least you don’t have to go to a high-risk OB-GYN now.” The second twin didn’t live much longer. I know my friend didn’t intend to sound callous; she probably thought she was helping. But when you’re three feet below everyone else, struggling to climb up, things sound different.

Over lunch, I told my friend I was over it, meaning infertility. But I’m not sure that’s the whole story. It’s not something I’ll ever be over, exactly, but it doesn’t define my existence any more. Part of that has to do with letting go and moving on to adoption. But at the same time, it’s because I made sure I wasn’t using adoption as a replacement for having a biological child. Adoption is separate from infertility. It isn’t the answer. In fact, the only aspect that unites the two in my mind is the common desired result: to be a parent.

Which is why you cannot tell someone to “just adopt.” As if there were anything “just” about it. It’s not like, “Hmm, what should I do today? Oh, I know! I’d love to fill out 500 government forms! I’ll just do that today! And then I’ll just schedule multiple visits with social workers, request letters of reference, declarations of good health, a complete financial inventory—I’ll lay bare every aspect of my life that can be summarized on paper. And then I’ll just have everything notarized. In triplicate.”

The complicated process aside, before making a new map for your life and choosing to adopt, you need to go as far as you feel comfortable going with treatment, mourn not being pregnant, and say goodbye to the future you assumed you’d have. While I’d love to say to my friend, “I know how much you’re hurting, and, Yes! there is light at the end of the tunnel if you adopt,” I believe that we need to exhaust hope until, well, until it exhausts us.

When I look back on my years of trying to get and stay pregnant, I wince at the pain I went through. I think about all the sad times and sad conversations with my husband and my infertile sisters. I wish none of us knew what that was like, but I’m not sure I’d take any of it back. It made me a stronger person, more empathetic, more appreciative.

And if our life hadn’t taken the course it did, I might never have chosen adoption, and Henry might never have become my son. That prospect is too scary to think about. After everything my husband and I went through in our quest for the “miracle of life,” I know now what the real miracle is. Through everything—through miles and oceans and air and time and loss and grief and healing and acceptance and love—we found a way to our son and he found his way to us.

SARAH KELLY is a freelance writer living in Queens, New York. She is in the process of “just adopting” a second child.

©2007 Adoptive Families. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part is prohibited.

Giggle Girl

Lainey just got this doll that laughs and she likes to smile at it and "talk" to it. Her way of talking right now is to squeak and squeal at whatever has gotten her attention.

Also, an update on the teeth: the two bottom chompers have emerged and I was bitten for the first time today!

Christmas Tree Day and SNOW!!!

We got our tree on Saturday morning and a couple hours later (after we ALL napped) we looked outside and it was snowing!!

I'm not opening the door until you agree to play with me!

Lainey would love nothing more than to play with Cooper. Unfortunately, he's still afraid of her.

The Look

I'm not sure what she's trying to tell us with this look but she makes this face all the time and it's hilarious!

Sleepy

I'm not sure if it's the season but I have been thinking a lot about how blessed I am to have such a beautiful happy family. Everyday with Lainey is such a gift that I still look at her and have to pinch myself that she's really mine.

Big Girl

This might be the last picture of Lainey without any teeth. I finally have spotted the bottom two!! I can't get "All I Want For Christmas is My Two Front Teeth" out of my head!!

Party Dress

Robert bought Lainey this outfit last year when we found out she was a girl. It has hung in her room since that day last fall, long before she was even here. We can't believe she's already wearing it!

Happy 1st Thanksgiving!

We had a great time visiting family at Grandma and Grandpa Reid's home in Olympia. Lainey being the center of attention while playing with her cousins Patton and Promise. There was even turkey for her--albeit in pureed format in a jar, but turkey nonetheless!

Touchdown Seahawks!!!

Having fun

Mom's a little late in getting a Jonny Jump-Up but it's better late than never!

Aloha!

We just got back from a week in Maui. Lainey thoroughly enjoyed herself digging her toes in the sand, swimming in the pool, playing with Porter and Lawson and waving hi to everyone she saw. She made friends everywhere we went. I had fun dressing her up in cute dresses that she never got to wear at home. There are some 500+ pictures to go through but these are a couple of my favorites.

Happy Halloween!!

Good Luck Charm

It seems that when Lainey and I go to the games, the Hawks win!!

Harley Girl

For Uncle Jeff...

New Dad Moment

So Robert just got home from a short trip to New York and brought Lainey back a couple of things. A onesie that says I Love NY and a very cute t-shirt that says New York. The onesie is size 12 months but being the new dad that he is, he grabbed a size 10-12 t-shirt thinking it was sized in months. It's going to be YEARS before it fits her!! Too cute. But I'm going to save it for her anyway. It will either be vintage by the time she can wear it or at the rate she's growing, it will fit in just a couple of years!

Crawling!

Pals

Bathtime!

Lainey really enjoyed her bath in the kitchen sink at Grandma and Grandpa Davis' house.

Grandpa Kisses

Nothing better.

Trip to North Dakota

Lainey and I had a great time visiting Grandma and Grandpa Davis in North Dakota. She didn't cry at all on any of our 4 flights, and had a great time playing with her aunts Karlie and Lacy. We can't wait to go back in the spring.

Giggles that will make any day better

For some reason me saying the word Icky just made Lainey giggle like crazy this afternoon. I didn't get the best of it on camera but here's a sample.

Sorry for the lousy camera action and my very annoying voice. It's hard trying to get her to laugh and hold a camera steady.

Guess what word I learned today?

VOMIT. Mommy says it's not a good word and I have to agree with her. I just don't like her homemade green beans and potatoes. Good news is she said I may not have to eat them again after today! YAY! I did get to take a bath at lunchtime which was loads of fun! I'm on my third outfit of the day and it's only 3pm. First, my tush exploded all over my diaper and on my pajamas, then I spit up all over myself at Costco and now we're seeing my lunch. Bad day all around. Oh, did I mention I have the hiccups too? Gee wiz, is it the weekend yet?

What's all the fuss about Halloween?

Happy 7 month Birthday Laineybug!

Life Lessons from Aunt Nan

Happy Fall!!

Sweet Tooth

For those of you who haven't experienced Trophy yet, it is cupcake heaven. You simply must try their cupcakes! Looks like Lainey can't wait! Thanks Aunt Jeena for taking this picture on her 6 month birthday!!

Lainey's Super Hero Powers

If she was a superhero I think her powers would be the ability to disappear. Another couple of minutes and I wouldn't have been able to find her! I should point out that although it looks like she's coming out from under the couch, she was actually going UNDER it. Of course, she thought it was quite funny to shock her Mom this way!

Do I have anything on my face?

Lainey and Dad

Seahawks Sunday

Just chillin

It's pajama time

Gotta love pj's that have a tail on the back! Thanks Aunt Nan!!